Who dun it?
You know you're a redneck if your dog farts and you take the credit.
Bear It All
A young polar bear walks up to his dad one day and asks, �Dad, am I a pure polar bear�you know, not part black bear, brown bear, or grizzly bear?�
�Why no, son. You come from a long line of proud an…
Mexican or Mexican''t
A Mexican walks into a bakery and asks, "Excuse me, may I have a bum, please?" The baker laughs and says, "Oh, you must mean a bun, sure, here you go." The Mexican next goes to the hardware store. He…
What's my name bitch?
A grey goose walks into a bar and says" I'd like a scotch on the rocks." The bartender looks at the goose funny, but goes to get him his drink anyway. The bartender continues to look at the goose so t…
Q: Why does a dog lick himself?
A: Because he can't make a fist.
To Diet For
A fat man sees an ad that reads "Lose weight. Only $10 a pound. Call (212) 555-DIET" and decides to make the call. The operator asks, "How much weight do you want to lose?"
"Twenty pounds," he replie…
Q: What are the two main political parties in Canada?
A: Moose and Squirrel
You know your a redneck if a beaver bites your nipple off!
I Think I'm a Moth
A guy walks into a dentist's office and says, "I think I'm a moth."
The dentist replies "You shouldn't be here. You should be seeing a psychiatrist..."
The guys replies, "I am seeing a psychiatrist…
The Three Little Pigs of North Jersey
Once upon a time there were three little pigs.
The straw pig, the stick pig, and the brick pig.
One day this nasty old wolf came up to the straw pigs house and said "I'm gonna huff and puff and blo…