The funniest jokes on the net

The Chief Executive of an HMO died and was very relieved that he got into heaven. Of course, he had to check out after 48 hours...

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I.

A man went to the doctor to get a physical. After the doctor examined him, he told the man he had some bad news... he had cancer and alzheimers. The man replied, '' Well, at least I don't have can

A man notices a peculiar rash on his chest. The rash continues to get worse and worse, so the man decides to see a doctor. He goes in to the clinic where the staff runs a battery of tests. After …

A man lying on a stretcher in the emergency room asks the doctor if he'll be okay. The doctor turns to him and says, "Well, there is good and bad news." "Tell me the bad news" says the man. "W…

An old man goes to see the doctor and gets some tests. When the results come in, the doctor calls the old man in and says, �You'd better sit down. It's pretty bad.� The old man, naturally, gets a…

There was a man who got into a car accident. He was soon rushed to the hospital. The left side of his body was completely paralyzed. The doctor said, "He was going to be all right."

A man and his son are in a car accident and are rushed to the hospital. But when he's wheeled into the OR, the doctor looks at the boy and says "I can't operate on this boy! He's my son!" Who's the do

An old man and a old lady went in the doctor's office to get their yearly exam. The doctor came in and started to get some information from them. He then told the old man that he needed to have a …

A group of doctors were at a convention in Switzerland. The topic of discussion was the new medical technology from their countries. 'In my country," a German doctor said, "medicine is so advance…