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You might be a redneck if you mow your grass and find three cars. You might be a redneck if you think the first four words of the national anthem are, ''Gentlemen start your engines''.

You might be a redneck if you drive a rusted out pickup, with a chrome balespike.

You might be a redneck if your wife wears the same underwear as you do.

You know you're a redneck if you do all of your Christmas shopping at a truck stop.

You might be a redneck if your wife yells, ''Come on, move this transmission so I can take a bath!''

How did the redneck die drinking milk? The cow sat on him!

You might be a redneck if every time you see a sign that says: “Just Say No To Crack,” it reminds you to pull up your pants.

You might be a redneck if your last pictures were taken from the front and side.

There were three boys all in third grade: an Asian boy, a Spanish boy and a redneck. They were trying to think of games to play at recess when the Asian boy got an idea. "I know," he said, "we can pla…

You might be a redneck if you have to take your hat off so your wife can fit into the truck with you.