Uncategorised jokes → GCSE Examination Paper. SEXISM STUDIES Time allowed

GCSE Examination Paper. SEXISM STUDIES

Time allowed 3 hrs.

Attempt all questions. If you do not know the answer to a particular
question attempt to look at someone else’s paper by knocking your biro
onto the floor and having a shufty while you lean over to retrieve it.
You are allowed one visit to the toilet to look at the answers you wrote
on the wall yesterday. After ten minutes, request more paper to frighten
the other candidates into thinking that you must have written loads.
Attempt to introduce the one or two facts you are reasonably sure of
into the answers to every question. At 4.30 exactly, everybody cough to
make the invigilator jump.

Section A (50%)

1. Explain why the best women’s football team in the world wouldn’t
stand a chance against you and ten of your mates. Include in your
answer:
a) Why they are unable to kick a ball straight
b) What you wouldn’t mind doing with them in the bath after the match, though.

2. Pamela Anderson’s tits are plastic but look good in photographs.
Compare and contrast the relative merits of plastic and real tits for
recreational purposes.

3. It is a long established fact that fat lasses are more grateful for
it. Outline some of the reasons why this is so, and explain why all
feminists are fat, ugly lesbians.

4. Write a critique of any ONE of the following films you have watched
at your mates house while his parents were away for the weekend.
a) Sex Boat
b) Three Into One Will Go
c) King Dong
d) Speared by Zulu Lovers

5. Women drivers, eh? Discuss.

Section B (50%)

6. Describe an experiment to impress a girl by lighting a fart. What
apparatus would you require? What risks would you run in lighting a
fart and what are the benefits? Write a balanced chemical equation to
describe the reaction that takes place when an eggy fart is lit in a
pub with a match.

7. Name something a woman has invented.

8. On average, women live 7 years longer than men yet get their pension
5 years earlier. Explain why this isn’t fair, making reference to
your lazy old granny who lived to be 100 and your poor granddad who
worked 52 years down the pit and died the day before he retired.

9. Argue heatedly over the respective merits of the Lambourghinni Diablo
and the Ferrari Testerossa without ever having seen, let alone
driven, either.

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