The funniest jokes on the net

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why was the lawyer skimming the Bible right before he died? He was looking for loopholes!

10. For your birthday, you get the head of an infidel 9. People never refer to you as "The crazy one in the family" 8. On weekends, you get to bring home weapons of mass destruction 7. Don't want …

Employee PA (Performance Assesment) The Perfect Worker 1 Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found 2 hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works independently, without 3 wastin…

Actual words found in church newsletters 1) Don't let worry kill you. Let the Church help. 2) Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community. 3) The rosebud on the altar…

A frustrated wife got some Viagra for her husband. Her doctor told her to give him one pill a night, and that he would call to check in with her after a week. That night, the wife popped one pill in…

What if Operating Systems Were Airlines? DOS Airlines Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let the plane coast until it hits the ground again, then they push agai…

ROSES ARE STRAIGHT VIOLETS ARE TWISTED BEND OVER LOVE YOUR ABOUT TO GET FISTED ROSES ARE CRAP VIOLETS ARE WANKY OOOH IV'E JUST COME PASS ME A HANKY ROSES ARE STUPID VIOLETS ARE SILLY GR…