Found 14 results for Retirement jokes

  • A young girl sees her father in the shower and asks (Uncategorised jokes)
    A young girl sees her father in the shower and asks him what him, "What are those between your legs?" "Those are the Apples of the Tree of Life," he tells her, by way of poetic concealment. Impr…
  • Things Couldn't Be Nurse (Sexuality jokes)
    A man is lying in bed in a hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young nurse appears to sponge his face and hands. "Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "Are my testicles black?" Embarr…
  • Too Cold for Fido (Uncategorised jokes)
    Q: How do you know when it is cold outside? A: When your dog's dick is frozen to the fire hydrant.
  • Play Dead (Whatever jokes)
    Yo mama is so old, I told her to act her age and she dropped dead.
  • Recycling (Whatever jokes)
    If good girls go to heaven and bad girls go to hell, where do whores go? To the Virgin Islands to be recycled!
  • Furrier Funnies (Sexuality jokes)
    Sam and a beautiful woman walk into a very posh Beverly Hills furrier. "Show the lady your finest mink!" the fellow exclaims. So the owner of the shop goes in back and comes out with an absolutely gor…
  • Crossbred Dogs (Animals jokes)
    Malamute x Pointer = Moot Point, favorites of lawyers but ... it doesn't seem to matter. Bull Terrier x Shitzu = Bullshitz, a gregarious but unreliable breed. Pointer x Setter = Poinsetter, a tradit…
  • A Disney Break Up (Children jokes)
    Mickey and Minnie have been having problems for some time now and after hearing of Barbie and Ken's break up, they too decide to call it quits. Donald goes to Mickey to console him and says, "She's b…
  • 15 Ways to be Annoying (Whatever jokes)
    1) Spend all day at a fast food restaurant, seeing how long it will take until your free refills cost money. 2) If paged, wait until midnight to answer the call. 3) Construct an elaborate disp…
  • Wheelchair Speed Demon (Uncategorised jokes)
    Ethel is a bit of a demon in her wheelchair and loves to charge around the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and getting up to maximum speed on the long corridors.  Because the poor woman is …
  • Blonde Painting A Porch (Blonde jokes)
    A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if…
  • Psychiatric Hotline (Whatever jokes)
    We've all had the annoying experience of calling up a hotline and waiting on the phone for eons to hear all the choices the lucky touch-tone dialers receive. Well, think how frustrating that would be …
  • Handy Worplace Phrases (Whatever jokes)
    Some pretty 'useful' phrases you, too, can use at the workplace when truly pushed to the edge:   1. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. 2. I'll tr…
  • Banana Love Cake (Uncategorised jokes)
    Banana Love Cake Ingredients: 2 whole nuts 1 large banana 2 Jugs milk 2 strong arms 2 well shaped legs 1 fur lined mixing bowl 4 loving eyes. Mixing instructions: Look into eyes, part…