Uncategorised jokes → Male Vocabulary -- The Insider Guide

Insider’s Guide to the Male Vocabulary

’’Haven’t I seen you before?‘’ = ’’Nice ass.’’

’’I’m a Romantic.‘’ = ’’I’m poor.’’

‘’I need you.’’ = ‘’My hand is tired.’’

‘’I am different from all the other guys.’’ = ‘’I am not circumcised.’’

‘’I want a commitment.’’ = ’’I’m sick of masturbation.’’

’’You’re the only girl I’ve ever cared about.‘’ = ’’You are the only girl who hasn’t rejected me.’’

‘’I really want to get to know you better.’’ = ‘’So I can tell my friends about it.’’

’’It’s just orange juice, try it.‘’ = ’’3 more shots, and she’ll have her legs around my head.’’

’’She’s kinda cute.‘’ = ’’I wouldn’t kick her out of bed but a pillow over the head might be necessary.’’

‘’I don’t know if I like her.‘’ = ’’She won’t sleep with me.’’

‘’I miss you so much.’’ = ‘’I am so horny that my male roommate is starting to look good.’’

‘’Was it good for you?’’ = ’’I’m insecure about my manhood.’’

‘’How do I compare with all your other boyfriends?’’ = ‘’Is my penis really that small?’’

‘’I had a wonderful time last night.’’ = ‘’Who the hell are you?’’

‘’Do you love me?’’ = ’’I’ve done something stupid and you might find out.’’

‘’Do you ’really’ love me?‘’ = ’’I’ve done something stupid and you’re going to find out sooner or later.’’

‘’How much do you love me?’’ = ’’I’ve done something really stupid and someone’s on their way to tell you by now.’’

‘’I have something to tell you.’’ = ‘’Get tested.’’

’’I’ll give you a call.‘’ = ’’I’d rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again.’’

’’I’ve been thinking a lot.‘’ = ’’You’re not as attractive as when I was drunk.’’

‘’I think we should just be friends.’’ = ’’You’re ugly.’’

’’I’ve learned a lot from you.‘’ = ’’Next!’’

’’I’m on a long distance call, can you call me later?‘’ = ’’I gotta turn on my answering machine.’’

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